One Month

Grayson is already one month old! It always goes by fast, but somehow it surprises me every time. Last weekend Becky flew in for a visit to help me out with Grayson. Mom and Dad also came to meet Grayson and they couldn't have come at a better time. I really needed them! And they were all a really good help to me. Becky even got up with Grayson one night so I could get some much needed sleep.

Grayson is learning to smile, and it's the cutest thing. He's still trying to figure out the sleeping thing. He'll go for a couple of days where he eats and sleeps like a normal baby, and then there are day when he hardly eats and sleeps at all, and those days are long and exhausting, but this too shall pass. Here are a few of my favorite pictures of him so far.

He was so tiny! And look at those eyebrows; he has so many different facial expressions.

He's changing so fast right before my eyes!

Easter

I forgot to throw Easter in here before Grayson showed up; he was only two days old. Since we are in quarantine we had our own Easter egg hunt in our back yard. The kids had a lot of fun and in the word of Zander “ the Easter bunny brought them exactly what they wanted!” After our egg hunt the kids got to fly their kites in the back yard.

First Bath

He really wasn’t a fan

Grayson’s Birth Story

This pregnancy was pretty normal and really pretty easy compared with my other three pregnancies. This pregnancy came with lots of prayer and concern as to whether or not it was the right thing to do. Stephen and I went back and forth on whether or not to have another baby. I had always felt that we were not done and that there was one more baby that was supposed to join our family while Stephen was  adamant that we were done and didn't want to have another baby. For two years it was a sore subject and I tried to leave it alone, but as Hannah got older (not to mention myself) I brought it up to Stephen. We discussed it, we prayed about it, and we took our questions and concerns to the lord in the temple. We fasted about what to do and to be ok with whatever answer we got. Several weeks passed and I brought it up to Stephen again to compare answers and decide on what we would do next for our family. Several months before all this happened I had, had two separate experiences where I distinctly remember being told that there was one more baby that was to join our family. As we discussed it again the conclusion we came to was that there was no right or wrong answer; it was up to us to decide if we wanted to have another baby.

I was grateful that we both got the same answer, but that just put us back to square one. I felt we needed to have another one while Stephen did not. Months passed as I tried to comes to terms that we might be done having kids, and then all of sudden I found myself pregnant with our fourth child. To say I was terrified to tell Stephen is an understatement. We spent a few weeks in Idaho over the summer and the week we got back home is when I found out. I had no idea how or when I was going to tell Stephen. Every time I tried to muster up the courage to tell him I chickened out and I sat on it for at least a week or longer until I just couldn’t wait anymore. I was afraid of how he would react, but I finally spilled the beans one night before getting into bed, and his reaction surprised me. He wasn’t at all mad like I thought he’d be and it immediately put me at ease. He even smiled! What a relief!

This pregnancy came with all the normal side affects like nausea and a very strong aversion to sweets. Anything with sugar  in it made me nauseated even if it was something savory, if it was too sweet tasting I couldn’t eat it. That lasted the first trimester and half of the second which was a good thing because then I didn’t gain extra weight from snacking on sweets. The one thing I really wanted to eat all the time were Lays sour cream and onion chips. I could go through a whole bag by myself in one sitting if I really wanted to, and I wanted to but didn’t. About that same time I started getting the pelvic floor pain that has always come with pregnancy. It gradually got worse and worse and by the end of the third trimester; it was really hard to move or lift my legs at all. I had a much smaller belly this time compared to my other pregnancies and I think I gained the least amount of weight too. I carried him really low which I had never done before. I actually enjoyed feeling him move and kick around in there. And boy was this kid active! I’ve never had a baby move constantly and with such force.  I wanted to enjoy this pregnancy as much as I could knowing it would be my last. I also knew I didn’t want to induce labor but let it go naturally. It was hard waiting especially since there were zero signs of labor on my due date.

I decided to get my membranes stripped to see if that would kick start labor. I was really optimistic, but the next day came and went, and the day after that and nothing happened. So I went back to the clinic to get it done again. This time it didn’t hurt as bad, and they said it should work this time. Another day passed and nothing happened. Then I finally started to get some constant contractions, yay! And of course they had to start and go through the night so I got very little to no sleep. By morning they started to slow down and quit altogether. I was really disappointed. By 2:00 in the afternoon they gradually started again for two hours and then they started getting stronger and closer together. I decided to try to walk through them and move around to see if that eased the pain better than just laying still like I did with Zander. A couple more hours passed and I was very uncomfortable and timing the contractions at five minutes apart and then they'd go to ten minutes apart so I knew it wasn't time to go to the hospital yet even though I wanted to. by about 6:30 they hadn't slowed down at all but they were becoming a lot more intense and I could hardly stand it, so I called the midwife to see if I could come in. I just wanted to be dilated to a 4 so that I could stay at the hospital and get an epidural. I talked to the midwife on call and she wasn't convinced that I was ready to come in yet. Mind you, I have a pretty high pain tolerance so I know if I can't handle it then it's definitely time to go in. The only thing stopping me was that even though the contractions were super intense and there was a huge amount of pressure they weren't coming close enough together for me to leave.

The midwife suggested I stay home longer and try to sleep or take a bath (insert eye roll here). Even though I really, really wanted to go to the hospital I stayed home like she suggested. I also tried to take a nap (not possible when you're in labor) at 9:00 pm I couldn't take it any more and was just about in tears as I called the midwife again and told her I had to come in. She was still skeptical that I was in active labor and tried to talk me out of it. I told her I was coming because I  couldn't bear the pain anymore. The baby was actually kicking and moving around during the contractions! I didn't even know babies could move during that time, but this one did and it was excruciating. The midwife she said it was fine if I came in, but the best she could do for me was to check to see how far dilated I was and give me some pain meds before sending me back home. I hung up on her, haha. I called my friend who was going to be staying with the kids over night and Stephen and I headed out. It was a 15 minute drive to the hospital. By the time I got checked in and changed into a gown and the midwife showed up it was close to 10:00. I really couldn't talk anymore all I could do was moan, and moan loud, because for some reason it helped me focus and get through the pain. The nurse commented that when you hear moaning that usually means the woman is fairly far along, so the midwife did a quick exam and announced that I was dilated to a 7! That's how far I was when I got to the hospital with Zander too. I couldn't believe I was that far along, but I was relieved because I knew I was going to be admitted. I couldn't get the epidural fast enough. The nurse and midwife also commented on much the baby was moving because he kept kicking the monitor off my belly.  I kept asking for the epidural over and over until the doctor finally showed up. That was the most painful epidural I've ever had. I don't usually feel the needle because I'm too focused on the pain of the contractions, but I felt every bit of that one, and actually yelled owe, owe, owe!

As soon as the epidural kicked in it was sweet relief. I was shaking uncontrollably since we left the house and it just got worse as he tried putting in the epidural. I apologized to Stephen for being so shaky but it was out of my control. It was like my body was going into shock from all the pain I was in. Anyway, I was able to relax a little and close my eyes for bit, not sleep, but close them so I could focus. within two hours of me coming to the hospital it was time to push. This was the longest and hardest baby I had to push (which wasn't that long) I only had to push through three contractions so it was around 10 minutes. Out he came and into my arms at 12:24 am. The midwife made a comment that my belling was all baby and lots of fluid like I had an abnormal amount of fluid in there.

Stephen and I had a beautiful 7.4 pound, 20.5 inch long, red headed baby boy. I instantly fell in love. What a way to start off the "day" on our 11 year wedding anniversary! I held him and nursed him for two hours after delivery and he stayed awake the whole time. He wasn't sleepy in the slightest. We had no idea what we were going to name him, but we were all really tired and looking forward to getting some sleep. Stephen left the hospital at 3:00 as I was settling into the recovery room.

We thought we had a name, but he just didn't look like it. For the first half of my pregnancy I had settled on the name Dean and secretly, in my head, tried to refer to the baby as Dean because I liked the name so much. It is a family name after my Grandpa Watson's twin brother Dean Watson. It wasn't until two thirds of the way through my pregnancy that I asked Stephen to come up with some names that he liked because I knew he wouldn't like mine. I told him I liked Dean but he wasn't sold on it. So we made a tiny list and I kept Dean at the top. Over the next few weeks the list grew to seven names. The runner up to Dean was Amos. We both liked it. I was looking for a strong, old fashion name and both those names fit the bill. Going to the hospital we were both thinking he was going to be an Amos, but the second I laid eyes on him I knew it wasn't meant to be. I was kind of bummed because I knew I wasn't going to get Dean either, so I had no idea what we were going to name him. Over the next 24 hours while I was recovering in the hospital and Stephen was at home we both looked at our list and started crossing off one name after the next. We hadn't spoken to each other about a name but we were doing the same thing. Another name on the list was Roman which was one that Stephen really liked, but I didn't. Before Stephen came back to the hospital to take me home I had crossed off all but two names on the list. They were Grayson and Roman much to my utter surprise. I hadn't seriously considered Grayson at all, but here it was staring me in the face. When Stephen came in the room we needed to finish all the paperwork, so I told Stephen that I had two names left. Stephen told me he had two names left too. Intrigued I asked him what they were, and he replied Grayson and Roman. We both had the same names! So I knew we were on the right path. We went back and forth until ultimately settling on Grayson Dean (Stephen let me me keep it as the middle name since it was a family name).

The older kids were anxiously waiting for our return so they could meet their new baby brother. They all fell in love with him too fighting over who got to hold him first. Hannah won that one. I am so glad everything worked out and he is healthy and I finally get to hold him in arms. Welcome to the family Grayson!

 

Grayson Dean Washburn 

Born on April 10, 2020

At 12:24 AM

20.5 inches long

7.4 lbs

 

Quarantine Activities

I’ll be honest, I am so glad I only have one child in school right now and it’s kindergarten. Having to do homeschool has not always been fun or easy. I can’t imagine having all my kids in school in various grades trying to teach them all and getting them to do school work and taking care of the home. Zander works for an least an hour every morning on his school work, and he’s getting quite good at reading.

Because I have a handful of young kids I don’t plan activities very often, but since we have nothing better to do sometime I have to be creative. So one day we playing indoor tennis.

During conference weekend we made homemade butter. We had the kids shake their own jars while we watched conference to keep them occupied. We also playing conference bingo and had lots of coloring activities for them do too. Stephen even made homemade rolls so we had something to eat it on. We didn’t realize just how much butter we use in a week. It’s a lot. 

And lastly I had to take a picture of this cute girl because she growing up in front of my eyes. She turned into a little girl overnight. 

March: In Like a Lion

Here we are again at the end of another month and I haven’t written anything even though there has been SO much that has happened this month. In fact, we have made world and church history this month, but because of the many prophecies and promises made by our prophet, apostles, and other church leaders over the past few years our family is and has been prepared for it all. I am extremely grateful for our church leaders—for their love and concern for the saints and people in general. Living in Utah the church is always in the news and put under and microscope, and I have felt like recently it has been attacked more forcefully by more people in the last few months. Everything that happened since the beginning of the year is a sign and testimony that the second coming is close at hand. President Nelson has warned and prophesied that this is true.

Here’s what’s happens this month:

“Mom, I can’t see!” -Hannah as she sat like this for the whole movie

 Lucas thought he was the luckiest boy. A few weeks ago we studied from the scriptures about feasting on the words of Christ, so his primary teachers brought a bunch of snacks and handed a couple out to the kids, then they told them they could all take as much as they wanted to demonstrate what feasting was. I think Lucas was in little boy heaven; he didn’t hold back at all. He came home with a grocery sack full of snacks like oranges, bananas, crackers, cookies, apple sauce, juice, candies, fruit snacks, and pencils. 

Stephen’s big trial finally came to an end the week of my birthday after 7 weeks of long, long work days and working weekends. It was such a relief and Stephen’s team won to boot, so we had a lot to celebrate that weekend especially with it being my 32nd birthday. We were finally able to get tickets to the Pompeii exhibit downtown that I had been waiting for since November. But that was the weekend everything changed. We had been following the news about the corona virus in China for the last several weeks and all the people on cruise ships that had been infected and quarantined, and I honestly didn’t think we’d end up like China and eventually surpassing their numbers of infected. It’s been hard to sort through fact and fiction in the news with what is really happening, and I was like a lot of other Americans who thought “ok this virus is in the US but it isn’t any worse than a bad flu; we’ll be ok” that was far from being accurate. So the day we were able to go to the museum it shut down. All the schools were closed for the next two weeks and in the coming week restaurants, gyms, salons, and other nonessential businesses were shut down all over Utah and the United States, and grocery stores were being wrecked and emptied within minutes of opening. 

On Wednesday the 18th somewhere around 7:04 am a 5.7 magnitude earthquake woke Stephen and I up from our slumber. I woke up first waiting for Stephen to wake to make sure it was really happening. I kinda just froze. At first I heard the blinds rattling and shaking and I thought maybe the windows had been opened for some reason because we had had a couple of really windy days, but then the bed started to shake and Stephen finally woke up. It lasted for about 15 seconds or so. As soon as it stopped I grabbed my robe and rushed downstairs to make sure the kids were ok. Surprisingly Lucas was the only one up watching tv. He asked why the couch was shaking. I went into Hannah’s bedroom to see if she was awake and ok. She was sitting up in bed and in a panicked voice shouted that her bed was shaking and ran to me to hold her. Stephen went to see if Zander was ok and he had slept through the whole thing. He had no idea we had just experienced an earthquake which kind of disappointed me because we have had talks and family nights dedicated to natural disaster safety. An earthquake is the most likely to occur here in Utah, so at least the kids now know what an earthquake is. We experienced several little aftershocks the rest of the morning until around 1:00 in the afternoon. We had a few things fall over on our bookshelf upstairs and empty mason jars and food in the fruit room in the basement fall off the shelf, but that was the extent of the “damage” of the earthquake. Downtown Salt Lake City and Magna where the epicenter was got hit the hardest. There was a fair amount of damage to buildings and homes but no one got hurt. That weekend I got our emergency backpack out and went through our supplies to update and add to it to make sure we were really prepared. 

Experiencing an earthquake was very eye opening and dare I say cool? Having to stay at home and practice social distancing these past few weeks has had its ups and downs. I actually like that Stephen gets to stay and work from home. He has a table set up in the bedroom and works for most of the day while I tend to the kids and help Zander with school work. We’re trying to keep it as normal as possible and stick to our routine even though things are very different now. We’ve talked to the kids about the Corona virus and what is happening around the world and in our own community. They don’t like or really understand why they can’t play with the neighbor kids, but with me being pregnant I just can’t risk anyone being in contact with other people except when Stephen needs to go to the grocery store. Any time anyone goes outside or leaves the house the first thing we all have to do is wash our hands. I’ve had to disinfect all surface areas around the house and things that get touched constantly like knobs, light switches, remotes, phones, handles, and the inside of the car just to be on the safe side. I have to go to my weekly doctor appointments and they have nurses guarding the doors with hand sanitizer and they have to ask a series of questions before I get a wristband put on to say that I am safe to be there. 

This pandemic has been taken a little more seriously and extra worrisome with me approaching my due date next Monday. But I’m confident in my midwife and that the baby and I will be just fine. So I’ve just been milling  around the house trying to get things set up in the nursery. We got new carpet put in last week and I love it! I am so glad we finally got it done. The nursery is painted and Stephen got the crib and other furniture put back together so we’re just patiently waiting for this little bug to decide to join us on the outside. 

Other things that have happened this month: We met with Hannah’s surgeon at primary’s earlier this month to see how she was progressing. He was very happy with how she looked and acted and asked if she was still on her meds. I told him we’d have to follow up with our infectious disease doctor. He said she probably didn’t need to be on them anymore. The mass left in her jaw has shrunk considerably to the size of a marble. And since that meeting it has shrunk even more to where I can hardly feel it now. So it’s been 6 months since we discovered her infection and 4 months since her surgery and she’s good as new!

Hannah has also gotten really good with her speech. She is pronouncing more letters and leaning more words, but the funny thing is she can’t pronounce the “c” or “k” sound at all she’ll use a “t” or “d” in its place. She has also adopted a British accent when she talks which is so funny because Lucas did the same thing when he was her age. She can also sing the entire abc song by herself, she can count to 10 and recognizes written numbers, and recognizes a few shapes. 

Lucas has learned to ride his bike without training wheels. He has been really excited about that and tries to ride his bike every day. This was the perfect size for him to learn on, but hopefully he’ll give his bike to Hannah and we can get him on a bigger bike this summer. He tries really hard to keep up with Zander.

Zander has been trying his hand at skateboarding on the skateboard he got from Santa. It has been frustrating for him, but he’ll get it eventually. He’s been trying to learn how to turn the board with his feet without having to stop.. 

We took the kids to the nature park down the road last week and brought their bikes so they could feed the ducks and get some exercise. They loved feeding the ducks, but it was really windy and sprinkling rain so we didn’t stay for too long, but we all had a great time getting out of the house.

Stephen put Hannah’s new dresser together last week and the kids were all too eager to help him build it. They had fun getting to hand dad tools and nails and getting a turn to hammer and use the screwdriver themselves. They eventually turned to the box the dresser came in and decided to make a truck so they set out hammering and screwing things into their box, coloring, and cutting things out to make it special. It was a good two day project for them to work on.

There has also been a lot of reading going on and I love to see the older kids reading to the younger ones.

The kids made pictures of a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow for St. Patrick’s day. They loved that little activity. It took them most of the morning, but their pictures turned out so cute.

And how can I forget that a few days after being ordered to stay home Mr. Lucas, who is almost five years old, decided it would be a good idea to wipe his bottom on the carpet like a dog on his bedroom floor. This did not make mom very happy nor was he when he had to clean it up all by himself.

Since we are having church here at home now it has been interesting to see how the kids behave. Stephen and I dress in our church clothes and we give the kids a choice if they want to dress in church clothes or regular clothes, but they can’t wear their pjs. I’ve explained to them why dad and I wear our church clothes because we are partaking of an ordinance and we should always wear our best clothes. I’m trying to get them to make the choice on their own. It’s interesting because during the sacrament all three kids will sit and wait quietly as we partake of the sacrament, but as soon as we dive into our 10 minute lesson they are up playing and goofing off. It’s been pretty frustrating to be honest, but we’re sticking to it and hoping they will learn how important it is to learn and study together as a family.